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A Letter To My Younger Self

This week in body image group, I offered a journal prompt for clients to write a letter to their younger selves.  The resource I obtained this idea from gave these instructions:


Pick a specific age -- the one that feels like you most needed a hug or a double high five.  Tell this littler you all the reasons you're awesome, say why you're proud of you, maybe draw yourself a trophy.  Tell you some of the wonderful, amazing things you're going to love about your life.  Then, take a moment to recognize that you're actually living that amazing, wonderful life right now.

And as per usual, I myself also participated in this activity - because why not do the tough work I'm also asking my clients to do!? Below is my result:

Dear 11-12 year old Abbie,
HI!!  Right now, you are very fixated and obsessed with food and your body.  It doesn't seem like a problem, but you are very, very sick.   And because I know that no one has told you this yet: YOU ARE AMAZING!  You are so kind, hardworking, but most importantly: you are not selfish or vain, or even conceited, because you struggle with an eating disorder.  (Yes, you have a diagnosed ED....I know that it is hard to believe - but just trust me on this, okay)!  

You won't get the language for another 17 years, but what you are struggling with is a mental health disorder.  Your brain craved some sort of structure when everything in your life felt like it was falling out of control. You struggle with anxiety - yes, you are sensitive, but you are NOT weird or wrong for that.  In fact, in your late 20's, you will actually learn a lot of people identify as "overly sensitive" and it's nothing to be ashamed of)!  Yes, your home life is fine and "normal;" your family loves you very much....but you still deserve to feel validated when things feel painful.

So if you haven't been told this lately:  I AM PROUD OF YOU!  Not only are you going to come out of this difficult time in your life stronger, wiser and healthier than ever before, but you will make it your life's purpose to fight eating disorders by becoming and ED dietitian.  (Yes, that is an actual career...and no, you will not be like the lady who handed you a meal plan and [basically] told you to just 'suck it up')!

But before all of that, you are going to meet amazing friends in high school and college; you will have your heart broken a few times; you will become more confident in yourself and break off a toxic long term relationship; you will make amazing memories; you will meet the love of your life, get married; you will birth the cutest little human ever...your life is actually really freaking great, so don't stress out about the minor details.  There is always something good on the horizon.

I can only speak from my current point of view - but I know there is still so much to learn about ourselves.  I truly can't wait to see and enjoy what more our life has in store for us. 












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